I was sent an invitation for prayer-at-the-pole. I was like “festivus pole, flag pole, or stripper pole?” In the interest of diversity, can we rotate venues?
Doomed to hell, I gave up on religion a long time ago.
My dad says I’m going to hell because I’m not baptised. I really wish he would have felt that passionately about it when I was an infant. Infants look cute in their little baptismal outfits. The Adult XL outfit just doesn’t look the same, and I’ve seen My Big Fat Greek Wedding. So, no, thank you.
When I was a caseworker I had a client who really wanted me to join her church. “You’re our kind of people! You should come.”
“Oh, thank you for the invite, but I don’t claim to any one religion.”
“No problem! Neither do we!”
“Really?” I’m hopeful. Ever spiritual, I’m always looking for a place to feel the presence of God.
“Yes. I mean, you do accept Jesus Christ as your savior, right?”
“Uh… no. Don’t get me wrong, he sounds amazing. But, no.”
“Oh darling, you must read Not Just A Carpenter. I’d hate to think for all your good deeds you’re still going to hell.”
Lord, me too. That’s gonna’ be a bummer, but I guess I’ll be in good company. I hope they have A/C now.
I get an A for effort. I’ve tried all kinds of religion. Nothing really seems to fit me. I know for sure fear based religion doesn’t suit me. Try as I might, I can’t fear God. My relationship with God is just…love. That’s it. I guess that’s everything. And I feel like, for me, religion interferes with my relationship with God. I don’t like confusing our connection with politics.
However, recently…I found my church!
Wanda Sykes, people. Wanda Sykes is my church.
Everytime I hear her I feel closer to God. No, I’m not kidding. I’ve been carving out my own little religion via comedians…and life coaches…and inspirational leaders. It’s an odd mix that I may need to start calling ‘Angie’s spiritual funky bunch,’ but it works. It works because how is not important. People speaking the truth in funny and intriguing ways feeds my soul.
What I’m saying is, don’t worry so much about how other people connect to the Universe, or how they communicate with God. Worry about yourself. Because God is pretty good at figuring out how to reach someone, whether that be church or temple or mosque or mother nature or 80’s music or Wanda Sykes. And some people are quite content to find peace in the absence of it all (a nod to my Atheist friends).