Mom needs to jump off the ledge and just lose it already.
I’m biking with the kids today.
I either need a wider bike seat or a smaller rear end. I don’t even want to know what I look like from behind as I ride this bike. Unfortunately, my brain, a sadist apparently, keeps imagining the scene for me.
It looks like my ass ate the seat. …Like an Angie Push-up pop on two wheels.
I hope my brain is exaggerating.
I suspect it’s not.
Regardless, it’s time I just jump off the edge and lose the rest of this damn weight.
There are lots of health reasons that should be my primary motivators. For instance the fact that my mother died of heart disease in her 40s and my grandmother died of a stroke in her 50s. The idea of doctors using a wire hanger to wire my sternum back together after open heart surgery is unappealing.
But that’s not what motivates me right now. What motivates me is this:
Not feeling and hearing my belly slapping against me as I do the running man (ya that happened)
Cute clothes. I’ve refused to shop until I’m buying a smaller size. These clothes are getting old.
Oh! The sexy dress I bought in a size 14 and a size 12, because I loved it and wanted to use it as incentive.
Sexy winter boots that fit over my calves.
Stamina…a person with this much energy needs the stamina to sustain it!
Back boobs. I need a breast reduction of the wrong kind.
Skinny sex. Ya, I said it.
Not having to account for my weight when I fill up the tub for a bubble bath.
And obviously, not having my ass swallow a bike seat.
Just being honest.
Let’s do this.
Austin Karaoke 5k, September 29. I’ll be there… Dressed like OliviaNewto-John in Let’s Get Physical, physical. I wanna’ get physicalllll.
All Ninja Raccoons and air band members welcome to join!
Angie, being Angie. A perfectly imperfect woman, daughter, friend, mother, and wife. I’m a lover and a fighter. I’m up, and I’m down. I succeed. I fuck up. (I cuss). I hope people see things here and in my writing they only think to themselves and are inspired to be unashamed of who they are.
Let’s live life… out loud.